


every rose has its thorns

by DragonEyez



Category: Friends at the Table (Podcast)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Behind the Scenes, Multi, the bachelorette au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-01
Updated: 2018-03-01
Packaged: 2019-03-25 16:46:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,169
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13838907
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DragonEyez/pseuds/DragonEyez
Summary: a behind the scenes fic inspired byall the wrong reasonsbysuperboyfriends





	every rose has its thorns

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [all the wrong reasons](https://archiveofourown.org/works/13573338) by [merthurlin](https://archiveofourown.org/users/merthurlin/pseuds/merthurlin). 



> i have never seen an episode of this show ever and i've read 2 aus about it so, accept these inaccuracies i guess

Gig was really excited to be get the news that he had made it onto the show after all. He was already used to almost constantly being on camera, and the other contestants seemed nice, albeit a bit odd. But that was probably because everyone was still getting used to being around everyone else and also the fact that their every thought, move, and interaction was being exploited for TV. Grand Magnificent and Echo Reverie had already started squabbling which was a little awkward, but Even Gardner managed to smooth things out between the two of them, which Gig was glad about because the next few months would be awful if everyone was just going to be at each other’s throats the whole time. Signet also seemed nice, and Tender was… also nice, just in a different way. She’d been flirting with nearly everyone as soon as they got on set, and Gig wasn’t sure how much of it had been an act.

“Glad you’re not going with catty for your main angle.” He had joked while shaking her hand, and he’d been relieved when she laughed at the obvious pun instead of getting annoyed.

“Well I do prefur to try and get along with people when pawsible.”

Fourteen Fifteen…well Gig couldn’t really get a read on them. They were polite but distant, really only able to be found shadowing Tender, otherwise they just...weren’t really around? Poor Gray always had the worst time trying to track them down. They also seemed to change constantly. Not like clothes, but their actual face. Maybe Fourteen was really into costume makeup, who knew. Gig hoped he would have an opportunity to hang out with them soon, he wanted to get to know them better, maybe then they wouldn’t be such a mystery.

The only person who really rubbed him the wrong way was that Robin’s Song guy. He was an asshole. Like, he ever managed to get under Signet’s skin, and Signet got along with everyone. It was like he was actively trying to start problems with the rest of the contestants, which made things suck, especially because it made Demani stressed, which made Gray even more stressed. Or maybe it was the other way around. He wasn’t really sure.

But he was sure about the fact that he would have some cool footage when all this was done (even if he was contractually forbidden from using any of it for his channel until the whole season aired). 

He’d interviewed Tender about the bar she ran sometimes, and Grand about his art (he built some really cool sculptures actually, which kinda made up for the fact that he was sorta a douche) and Echo about their sword. He even took a couple pictures (with Echo’s permission of course), explaining, “My buddy Kent has this whole pirate aesthetic going on, he’d go nuts about your sword.” Gig was thrilled when he got back several lines of keysmashing before Kent demanded he found out where Echo had got it made. He showed the screen to Echo with a grin, and was pleased when they gave him a small smile in return. 

He counted that as a win.

\---

Something was up with Production, but Echo couldn’t bring themself to care. They had enough going on between doing their best to stay out of the cameras and the incessant noise that was Grand Magnificent. Always, always about the “art.” They would probably be able to tolerate him if he seemed even a little abashed at his own behavior, but it was like he had absolutely no concept of shame. At all. He was unbelievably cocky, it was fucking ridiculous. Worse still, it was like Grand didn’t even notice how much he got on Echo’s nerves. He’d followed them around for the first week and a half, trying to convince them to participate in some visual art project he was planning about werewolves or some shit like that. Even did his best to mediate, but even he couldn’t keep the peace all the time especially since he seemed to be unable to say no to some of Gig and Grand’s more elaborate shenanigans (not that Echo could either, but that's because they were bored).

Even had shown them all where the blind spots were fairly early on, so they went to sit by themself whenever they were sure they wouldn’t be missed. It was nice to get away from the chaos of it all and just breathe. Or, it would have been. If Grand Fucking Magnificent hadn’t crashed into their hiding spot fifteen minutes later. 

“Oh my god how the fuck do you manage to do this like every single time?” They threw their hands up in complete exasperation. 

Grand frowned at them. “How do I do what? You’ll have to be specific, I do a lot of things. For instance, right now I-”

“How do you always manage to track me down, no matter what. I swear it’s like you have a tracker on me.”

Grand looked mildly affronted. “What are you talking about? I always come here, it’s where I do some of my best sketches.”

“There’s like six other spots you could go to!”

“But I like this one best! Maybe there are six other spots you should go to instead. Besides, neither of us has a monopoly on hiding spots. Maybe we should just share instead. And then I could talk to you more about the w-”

“Do you ever stop talking?!” Echo grabbed him by the collar and pulled him down to meet their lips in a fierce kiss. Grand squeaked in surprise before sinking into it quickly. 

When Echo pulled away, Grand blinked in surprise several times before smiling. 

“What?” They eyed him with suspicion.

“I just had a brilliant moment of inspiration about a statue with 4 interconnected pieces and-“

Echo pulled him back down with a roll of their eyes. “Tell me later.” They murmured against the side of his mouth

\---

As soon as he had the all clear from Gray and Cascara, Even went to go track down Grand. He stopped by Gig’s room to see if either he or Echo had seen him, but the two had been otherwise occupied and hadn’t seen him since breakfast. He smiled at them fondly before leaving to go explore some of the unmapped areas of the grounds. The first one was empty, and the second one revealed Fourteen on the phone, so he left quickly to avoid accidentally overhearing anything. Twenty more minutes of searching revealed Grand sitting on a bench tucked behind a hedge.

Grand was, as Even had suspected, sulking. No tears yet, but he was uncharacteristically pulled in on himself. With a sigh, he sat next to Grand and pulled him to his side. For a moment, he was worried Grand would continue to stubbornly ignore him, but after a few minutes he leaned into the touch. Even dropped a kiss on top of his head apologetically. “I’m sorry, Grand.” He only got a few grumbles in response. “I know.” 

“I’m not terrible.”

“No you’re not. And everyone who’s important here knows that. We know that.”

After a few more minutes of silence, Grand turned over to look at Even. “Look, it’s not like I don’t know you’re only going along with what the show wants.”

“Gray told me to ‘channel those disappointed dad vibes,’ whatever that means.”

Grand snorted at that, looking up at Even's confused face. Upon realizing that he wasn't kidding, it turned into a full laugh. 

"Even you're the Dad Friend. You have such a 'I'm Not Mad I'm Disappointed' vibe it's unreal. You make dad jokes, and let's be honest, outside the show you probably dress like a dad too. Dad Friend(TM)."

"Really?"

"Yes."

Even was taken aback. He knew he was the more serious out of the group, and he was little more serious, but he didn't realize that made him a “Dad”. "Really?"

Rolling his eyes, Grand pressed a soft kiss to Even’s temple and then stood up. “Come on, let’s go find Gig so he can back me up here.”

“Glad you’re feeling better!” Even murmured.

\---

Fourteen was very good at their job. That was why Castlerose Network entrusted them to even bother with a show like this one. However, it had been...difficult to do their job as of late. Mainly because much of their time had been occupied. Mainly by Tender. 

She had wormed her way into their space and before they even realized, they considered her a close friend (and shortly after, “caught feelings” as Gig would say). Fourteen certainly enjoyed her company, but the fact that they were there to _do something_ was constantly at the back of their mind. Every so often, they caught Signet looking at them thoughtfully like she somehow knew, and it was putting Fourteen on edge. 

Eventually, they screwed up their courage to reveal to Tender _exactly_ what their business on such an inane show was, and after breakfast, they squared their shoulders and went downstairs to find her. Something seemed _off_ to them as soon as they stepped into the living room. Tender’s ears were flat on the top of her head, and her tail twitched back and forth, a sign that Fourteen knew meant she was anxious. Signet had her knees pulled up to her chest on the couch, watching Tender watch someone else, and finally, Fourteen allowed themself to track where were they were both looking.

A slight looking woman with a sharp smile was gazing levelly at Tender. “Long time no see babe. How’s life as a narc treating you? I’ve been fine by the way. Not that you would know, since you haven't bothered to check up on me.”

Realization dawned on them. This was Tender’s ex-girlfriend, Open Metal. Tender hadn’t been notably forthcoming with all the details of their split (which was fair, and they hadn’t pushed her for them) but she had revealed enough for them to know that they hadn’t been the best together, and their relationship hadn’t ended well. Fourteen’s lip curled back in an unpleasant snarl and they rushed her before she could make another snide comment.

Before anyone had even realized it, Open Metal was on the floor and Fourteen was standing above her. “I will not allow you to talk like that to Tender.” 

After Tender, Fourteen, and Signet settled everything with a very distressed Gray, Fourteen took Tender off to the side. 

“Tender, I need to tell you something.”

\---

At the end of the season, all Grand wanted was to relax and spend time with his datefriends. It was a relief to finally be able to stop performing (to a certain extent) and just fly out to Even’s place. They’d all talked about it before they’d left at varying points in the season and a little bit after when they could, and the agreement they’d come to was that Even had the most amount of space for all four of them, where they could all have their own little spaces, and Echo agreed to sell their gym and start a new one, and Grand could find a new studio easily, so it was really no problem.

The only thing that sucked was that they still had to keep everything on the downlow until the rest of the season aired, which Gig mostly complained about because he wanted to release the videos he had finally finished editing. Grand was equally frustrated, because he had a new stature that he still had to wait unveil because it was technically considered a “violation of contract,” despite the fact that it was fairly nondescript. Even and Echo tolerated their complaints good-naturedly, but Grand could tell they were also antsy. It was only made worse when they got invitations in the mail to Gray and Demani’s wedding. Then they were _all_ anxious for the time to pass.

It didn’t stop Grand from answering the phone one night when he got a call that woke them all up. Gig smacked at him sleepily, trying to make him turn it off. Echo covered their head with a pillow and rolled back over, while Even looked at him in confusion.

“Hello?”

“Hi there, sorry to call so late, but I’ve got an amazing opportunity for you!” An obnoxiously peppy voice practically shouted into his ear.

“Yes?”

“Grand Magnificent, you were a hit on the last season of The Bachelorette!”

“Yes, and?”

“How would you like to be the star of the next season of The Bachelor?”

Grand was suddenly wide awake, brain spinning with ideas and possibilities and the promise of more exposure. “Yes of course, this could be a great artistic opportuni-”

Echo snatched the phone from his hand and hung it up viciously before turning it off. 

“No.”

With a sigh, Grand laid back down in between Even and Gig. Maybe it had been more trouble than it was worth.

**Author's Note:**

> as always, comments and constructive criticism is always appreciated and i can be found [here](https://theunacceptablepylades.tumblr.com/) or on twitter @queerlydeparted


End file.
